A few days ago, I had written a post on this blog Working Mothers – The “Real” Issues. The post got a lot of readership (Thanks to all those who read it) and also many people wrote back, and asked if there were any suggestions on how to deal with some / many of these.
Looking back at my own life – Ever since I became a mother myself, I have a new found respect and admiration for all working mothers.
No matter what you do
No matter where you live
No matter what else you do
If you’re a working mother
Hats off to you
Simply because every working mother had to deal with several “mini-projects” as I call it on a daily basis
Project 1 : Kids (A to Z)
Project 2 : Work / Career
Project 3 : Food and Cooking
Project 4 : Husband (Yes! A full time project )
Project 5 : Friends
Project 6 : Home Maintenance
Project 7 : Family
Project 8 : Self
Project 9 : Miscellaneous / Others
Just listing it down exhausted me! Then imagine how exhausting it would be to manage every single one of them, every single day!
Well, thankfully along the way I figured a few Mantras to make it easy for myself. In this post I am sharing my mantras with the hope that it may resonate or help you
Mantra 1 : Re-define Perfection
One of the most important milestone in my journey as a working mother was when I let-go of “PERFECTION”, rather I re-defined it. Yes, I accepted that everything and everyone will NOT be “perfect” all the time (even in my own eyes). And that’s OK! It’s OK if you don’t look your best always, It’s OK if you don’t have the cleanest house always, It’s OK if your cupboards are not the best organized always, It’s OK if you don’t get the BEST MOM Award everyday, It’s OK to say “No” at work – when the situation warrants, It’s just OK……. That single moment was the “Nirvana” moment 🙂
Mantra 2 : Let Go of Control
There is a strong co-relation between women and their need to control OR feel in control of things. Up to a point, it is good! Beyond that, it is ?.
As a working mother, it is important to acknowledge and accept that you will NOT be in control of everything all the time. Just re-calibrating your own expectations of what in in your control, and what is out of your control helps tremendously.
Next, finding realistic and practical ways to deal with situations which are beyond your control helps tremendously in finding balance between professional commitments and personal priorities
Mantra 3 : You are not a SUPERWOMAN ; Accept limitations
Yes! You are not born a SUPERWOMAN. You have your set of limitations, constraints and realities to live with. You have only 24 hours in a day, and only 2 eyes, 1 nose, 2 ears, 2 hands & 2 legs – like everyone else! You have your share of highs and lows, ups and downs, emotions, trials and tribulations.
(1) You cannot possibly make everyone happy all the time
(2) You may not be able to live up to everyone’s expectations all the time
(3) You may put yourself before others – sometimes or many times
All the (3) above are perfectly OK.
Mantra 4 : Ask “Will this REALLY matter 10 years from now?”
One of the most powerful question I ask myself when I have a tough time deciding things is “Will this REALLY matter 10 years from now?”. More often than not, I see the situation in a totally different perspective, and find satisfactory answers to whatever situation I am facing. Try it the next time you are up against a brick wall, and you will experience the difference.
Now I’d love to hear your Mantras. Leave a comment to let me know